Seasons of Looooovvee

Happy Valentine's Day!!

I have always loved celebrating Valentine’s with my friends. Pink and red and hearts and CANDY? I can never get enough. I loved decorating those Valentine’s boxes in elementary school and picking out the perfect pack of valentines to give to my classmates. I also loved that my family all gave each other small gifts for the holiday too. Even after I moved out, my mom always sends me a little gift. A few years ago, she sent me a corgi squishmallow. It’s the small things that you never know you needed that make me feel so loved. Like my mom saw that corgi and was like “you know what? Juliana would love this.” The thought really does count.

Inner Thoughts from the Week

I do not have any interesting thoughts to share this week, but I do have a story time.

I went to the doctor yesterday. This is the first time I have seen just a regular doctor (not dermatologist, OBGYN, eye doctor, etc.) since I was 19. The 5-year gap meant there was a lot to catch her up on. I could go on and on about how much I really liked this new doctor. Without getting into the nitty gritty, she wanted to run a bunch of blood tests. I also asked for a flu shot because I am a responsible person and citizen. The nurse came in to draw blood and give me my shot. As most of you know, I have a history of fainting/almost fainting from getting blood drawn. However, the past ~4 times I have gotten blood drawn I was okay. Not yesterday… I think it was the shot and blood draw double whammy that got me. It was approximately 15-30 seconds after she did both that my vision started to go black, and my hearing was muffled. I did not lose consciousness, but I got as close as possible. At least that’s what it felt like. My heart rate dropped to like 50 bpm, I lost all color in my face, and I sweat through my t-shirt and leggings to the point where there were sweat stains on the paper when I got up from the exam table. The doctor herself came to check on me and bring me cookies. After what felt like 30 minutes of trying to come back to normal, I was able to leave. I AM OKAY NOW.

There is one thought I did have during this ordeal. When I started to black out and lose my hearing, I thought “What if this is the end?”. What if I just had a bad reaction to the flu shot? I contemplated how long it would take for death to-

I think I will just pray and journal about this one.

What I’m Reading

I finished Silent Patient and Handmaid’s Tale! I especially loved the afterword by Margaret Atwood. Still working through Iron Flame. I just started After I Do by TJK.

What I’m Watching

Season 4 of Always Sunny in Philadelphia. Feel like it’s fitting given the Superbowl outcome. Speaking of the Superbowl, I tuned in for the first 3 quarters, with anticipation for the halftime show. I personally enjoyed it and need Kendrick’s jeans. Unfortunately, they are already sold out (would have linked them, but link is gone). This is good for my bank account because who am I to spend a month’s rent on a pair of jeans?

What I’m Listening to:

Heard it through the graaapevine she can be a diiiva cold like minnesooota hotter than a feeeva!

Deluxe albums by ROLE MODEL & Sabrina just released today! I am already listening and will continue to do so.

What I’m Wearing:

I have been wearing my Nuuly items! I put on the cute trench coat I ordered to wear to work on Tuesday. I looked out the window as I was eating cereal before Emma came to pick me up (carpool gang) and it started snowing, so I changed back into my waterproof winter coat… not as fun and fashionable.

What I’m Eating:

We went to Le Colonial for dinner, and it was delicious. The price was pretty reasonable considering the quality and quantity of food. We had leftovers!

What I’m Laughing About:

Lina showed me these videos that this guy from her high school makes. He must be a trainer at a gym, but they have to come up with “creative” workout routines or something to post on Instagram. Literally was in tears watching these. I would post on here but want to respect his privacy. (Yes, I will DM it to you if you ask) Accidentally liked one too many videos because I got a follow request from him.

Charlie Puth story about Kanye. What Kanye is doing is no laughing matter but this story senddssss me. It’s the “I beg you” x2.

What I’m Learning:

I am learning how to speak assertively (not aggressively), and it is so difficult!!! Will I ever master this skill?

What I’m Loving:

In the spirit of Valentine’s, I am loving love. Love in all of its forms. Friendship, family, loyalty, romance, selfless, and unconditional love. (Alt: daylights, sunsets, midnights, cups of coffee, etc.)

Final Thoughts

I did something scary. I told my coworker that he had misspelled my name on some documents for Toastmasters. He is so kind, so naturally he felt terrible and said he would fix it. However, on the list of roles for the next meeting, my name is spelled with two n’s… Do I say something? I give up.